Monthly Archives: March 2011

PERSONAL VALUES

Values are simply defined as worth, merit, importance and moral. It means your relative worth and moral principles that you run your life on. Values are those things that help us make reasonable decisions when we are faced with challenging moments, difficulties and temptations in life. Your values are your inner compass guide. Everyone has instincts or conscience to be able to make wise decisions which can be fully developed based on your relationship with God. Our creator has put within us gifts, talents in potential form which must be discovered, developed, released and maximized. You are a child born in due season, packaged to affect your generation positively. You are a solution provider, don’t in any way live to become part of the problem. As you climb your ladder of success you must constantly ask yourself this basic question “if you were thrown up and emptied, what will become of you and what stuff will it suggest that you are made of at the end of the day?

 You must watch out for the hindrances to the development of sound personal values:

Your Association: Who your friends are; whose words and advice do you take?

Your Words: How you see yourself in the game of life whether as a victim or a victor?

Your Thoughts: How do you tackle simple challenges, do you have a possibility or impossibility mentality?

 Your Perspective: How you perceive/interpret things, whether it is attainable or unattainable?

Life will always pave way for those who make up their mind to make a mark on the sands of time. You must understand that your purpose when aligned with your values ushers you into a life yielded to God in the service of humanity. So this week show me who your friends are and I can without fail predict the future; for whoever walks with the wise shall surely become wise.

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DEFENDING BODE GEORGE’S CELEBRATION

Guys..this would sure make you laugh, celebrating those who we should be punishing, welldone GEJ, but how far would we go with this…for how long would we continue to suffer in silence? How long do we suffer shame ….. well this piece is for your perusal

I want to commend President Goodluck Jonathan for recognizing and welcoming Chief Bode George at the PDP rally in Lagos; expectedly some who are terrified at the prospect of sharing the political space with Bode George will deprecate such presidential  generosity; so many media columnist and commentators have described the events following his release as a “celebration of criminality” I beg to differ, amongst the honest commentaries I have read is that by my friend Mr. Bamidele Aturu who said, My view is that here is nothing wrong with somebody celebrating or thanking God for coming out of prison safely. I have been there; I know what it means for somebody to come out of Nigeria Prison safely.

However, we must show a level of humility and sobriety. For him to thank God for his life, it’s a worthy celebration.

The irony of most of the virulent attackers of Bode George today is that they are not on a higher moral ground is unfortunate because he broke the proverbial “11th commandment” he got caught!! Many of the traducers of George remind me of the man from your hometown who was completing a form, when he got to the column where he was asked ‘have you ever been convicted?” he answered No, the next question was “reason “(intended for those who answered “yes”) but our man answered “Never been caught” we remind them, that as they point at Bode George, four fingers point at them. This reminds one of the great words on marble by the President Candidate of Action Congress of Nigeria CAN Mallam Nuhu Ribadu when he was EFCC Chairman, VIZ:

“Tinubu and the rest (other governors) should consider themselves as very lucky. They ought to have been where Dariye, Fayose, Alamiesiegha are today. They cannot escape. It is a matter of time. They have the protection of the law. They enjoy immunity. “We are after them because they will want to rule us again. The constitution is made against indicted people. After their tenure, they will be prosecuted. They remain indicted and are not fit to hold public positions” “these people have to answer for their misdeeds instead of giving the impression that they cannot be dealt with”

George has answered for his misdeeds, tomorrow we do not know for whom the bell tolls… as for the commentaries and reactions of his political rivals and opponents, I say what do you expect? Ikemba Nnewi wittily stated that “whatever you are doing that your enemy doesn’t like is good, continue doing it!! He also said “if somebody who has never supported you gives you an advice, do not take it”. I send the same counsel to chief Bode George.

I understand that Bode George is a communicant at the cathedral and he had received wise counsel in the past from that pulpit, I therefore highly recommend to him always to remember the homily by the venerable Tayo Aduloju as given on Saturday 26th February 2011; if he abides by that wise and holy counsel, one day he will appear before a judge whose judgment has no appeal and if that judge finds him guiltless, I assure him, of his place in the place where his enemies will truly truly envy him.

Culled from BusinessWorld

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PRESUMPTIONS

Hi guys, today I write on presumptions, most people would have heard this story several times, but I would like to stress on the topic, people never take the time to look deep into facts before they conclude, from my school days I had always been a victim of hate and beef, from people who never knew me, but see me from a distance and call me names, well I would not blame them as Tuface and MI said, people must talk about you,

 The major problems people have is concluding without proper investigations, what would you gain if you just conclude on an issue without checking through records, presumptions might lead to different negative things, like deformation of character, abuse of privileges, misjudge people, you might lose everything especially the good things in life because you failed to study happenings,

 Please digest the story beneath;

 There is a legend about a woman who had a faithful dog. This dog was so faithful that the woman could leave her baby with it and go out to attend to other matters. She always returned to find the child soundly asleep with the dog faithfully watching over him. One day something tragic happened, the woman as usual left the baby in the “hands” of this faithful dog and went shopping. When she returned, she discovered a rather nasty scene, there was a total mess, the baby’s cot was dismantled, nappies and clothes torn to shreds with bloodstains all over the bedroom where she left the child and the dog. Shocked, the woman wailed as she began looking for the baby, suddenly she saw the faithful dog emerging from under the bed, covered with blood and licking its mouth as if it had just finished a delicious meal. The woman went berserk and assumed that the dog had devoured her baby. Without much thought, she clubbed the dog to death. But as she continued searching for the “remains” of her child, she beheld another scene. Close to the bed was the baby, who although lying on bare floor was safe, and under the bed the carcass of a jackal torn to pieces in what must have been a fierce battle between it and the already dead dog. The dog fought to protect the baby from the ravenous jackal but it was too late because in her impatience and anger, she had killed the faithful dog.

 “This calls for consideration; the need to be careful on how we are often quick to misjudge others, criticize, misinterpret based on myopic prejudice or even in some other cases  tear them to shreds with harsh words, attitudes and actions before we actually have time to evaluate the situation. We can presume things based on hearsay, inadequate information, already biased attitude whereas a little patience can minimize or eliminate lifelong errors. “He, who judges a matter before hearing it, most times acts foolishly and makes irrational conclusions”.

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101 ROMANTIC GESTURES

These romantic gestures are quick and easy ways to show your love. Often times the most romantic gestures are the small acts we choose to do every day. This extensive list of 101 romantic gestures will help you be more creative in how you show your love.

1. Massage her feet
2. Clean her car
3. Stick a post-it love note in the kitchen
4. Snuggle
5. Make a romantic mix CD
6. Dance under the stars (with your mix CD playing from the car)
7. Hide love notes in her house and car (make sure she’ll find them fairly soon)
8. Have an undisturbed conversation (turn off phones, TV, computer etc.)
9. Light every candle you have to set a seductive, intimate mood
10. Pick up a pie or cake for dessert
11. Do the laundry
12. Write a message on the mirror with a bar of soap
13. Make a calendar with photos of both of you together
14. Unwind with a glass of wine
15. Pick her up and carry her to the bed or couch
16. Complete her Honey-Do list
17. Download a new ring to her cell phone for your calls
18. Share things about your day (work, family, clients, events)
19. Restock the cabinets with her favorite food or drink (don’t forget to leave a note with it)
20. Hold hands
21. Change her oil
22. Give a sincere compliment
23. Go on a walk together
24. Run your fingers through her hair and give her a head rub
25. Go for a joy ride on a scenic road
26. Fold cloths during a game or on your TV show commercials
27. Change her computer screen saver to a love message
28. Cook a meal together
29. Do a slow dance after dinner
30. Kiss when you leave
31. Help her with a project
32. Thank her for a meal she cooked
33. Go grocery shopping together
34. Have a sunrise coffee date (even if it’s just from your deck or window)
35. Hold each other during a big storm
36. Put the toilet seat down (let her know you did it for her)
37. Slip a love note in her purse or work tote
38. Spend 30 mins power cleaning together and 30 mins passionately lovin
39. Walk around the room during a commercial break
40. Kiss when you arrive
41. Make dinner for her
42. Say “I love you because ______”
43. Find out one of her fantasies and make it happen
44. Pay her compliments in front of people you know
45. Make a “10 favorite memories together” list
46. Do yard work (shovel snow, rake leaves, mow, prune, plant)
47. Send a love ransom note with cut out letters
48. Spend time learning/doing her hobby with her
49. Stop at a scenic outlook enjoy the view and each other
50. Get a sensual game to play together
51. Take the garbage out
52. Put a love note with her lunch
53. Go on a bike ride or roller blade together
54. Bring her breakfast or coffee in bed
55. Open doors for her
56. Fix something
57. Leave some Hershey kisses on the pillow
58. Play if/then. If you ______, then I’ll ______
59. Tell her you are proud of her
60. Dance to a classic 80’s song
61. Carry her bags/boxes/books
62. Send a thinking of you email
63. Bake a cake and decorate it with a creative message
64. Act out her favorite love scene from a movie
65. Make a “10 things I love about you” list
66. Help with or do the dishes
67. Write a love note on her calender or in her planner
68. Collect a wild flower bouquet for her
69. Tell her you like her style
70. Kiss each of her finger tips
71. Send a romantic greeting [http://www.romanticgreetings.com]
72. Give a midday call
73. Serenade her with a cheesy love song (in the privacy of your home)
74. Have a quickie somewhere new
75. Whisper sweet nothings in her ear
76. Take some scandalous photos together or of each other
77. Write a love message on the beach or in fresh snow
78. Set your alarm 15 minutes earlier and snuggle in the morning
79. Take a minute to enjoy the sunset together
80. Take a romantic bath
81. Pull out her chair before sitting
82. Give her a big, long hug
83. Make a favorite things about you list
84. Plant a tree or flowers together
85. Let her know that she is the perfect match for you
86. Vacuum, dust or clean the toilet
87. Leave a goofy love message on her phone
88. Experiment with chocolate body paints
89. Make an “I love the ways you love me” list
90. Rub each other down in the shower
91. Be her slave for a day
92. Make a cheesy love poem
93. Make a meal together
94. Pack something special with her lunch (kisses, a note, her favorite snack)
95. Have a breakfast date discuss your plans for the day
96. Take care of car maintenance (oil, tire rotation, check fluids)
97. Express appreciation for specific things she does for you
98. Massage her neck and shoulders
99. Make her a gift
100. Play footsie
101. Offer to help with anything

You may be really good at doing some of these romantic gestures. Use this list to pick up a few more romantic gestures and apply them to your relationship. Put your own twist on some of the ideas for a personal and unique romantic gesture!

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DO MEN WANT SKINNY WOMEN?

Now this would totally make for interesting reading, I stumbled on this and I really want to share with everyone, its a bloggers thought on what men want and what they get.

Sleeping With A Skeleton
I’ve asked hundreds upon hundreds of guys what kind of body type they like on a woman and although none of them were shouting out Rosie O’Donnell and Aretha Franklin’s names, they weren’t screaming for little Miss Ally McBeal either.

All men like breasts (hello Dolly!) and all men like buns; I think Jennifer Lopez proved that one hands down (or around, whatever you prefer). Needless to say, although big flabby bellies and cellulite didn’t make the hit list, meat on a woman is thought to be attractive by virtually all men.

One particular guy, who I’ll call Lars, made an interesting point: “I like fit women. Skinny? Anyone can be skinny, but how many women can claim that they’re fit? There’s nothing more unattractive than a thin woman with no muscle tone. If that’s the case, I’d prefer a more voluptuous woman, milky if you will.”

What Do Men Like?
So what do all you guys want? Well, if men were all the same, that would be quite an easy question to answer. But alas, we’re all different and so all men have differing desires when it comes to the abundance of women that come in all shapes and sizes.

Whereas some guys prefer petite women and all the tiny things that come with them, other guys admitted that they love bigger women simply because they seem “more comfortable with themselves.” Come on, I’ve met plenty of women who could give Kiana Tom a run for her money and they were quite pleased with everything about themselves. Trust me.

But one thing that just about all these guys agreed on is that they don’t like those lollipop-looking women. You know, those caricatures with big heads that stand out from the rest of the body. It just doesn’t look healthy or attractive.

The Bigger, The Better
Although the mainstream media usually sexualizes the fit and thin, there are plenty of big boned women out there who are the object of many a man’s adoration. Anna Nicole, Camryn Manheim and even Oprah are heavily adored by men worldwide. Does their size hinder them from being sexual? No. Is it possible that guys only adore them because they’re loaded? Maybe.

But we have to come to terms with what’s happening around us. The media might be throwing skinny women in our faces all the time, but we are the ones who perpetuate the problem by letting them.

Did you know that after Renee Zellweger wrapped up filming Bridget Jones’s Diary (in which she had to gain about 20 pounds), she was supposed to do the cover for Harper’s Bazaar magazine, but they finally refused because they felt she was “too fat” to sell copies?

So is it the media that dictates what we like, or are we the ones who make the decision to ostracize portly women? I mean, Jennifer may have a dump like a truck, but let’s face it; she is not — in any way, shape or form — fat.

A lot of guys always say that “she’s too skinny” or “that’s not attractive,” but in the next breath we’ll point out a woman’s imperfections in a heartbeat — I’m a prime example of that. But it’s only normal that the bodies of supermodels and movie stars would end up serving as the norm. Not just for men, but women as well.

Oh Marilyn
There was a time when voluptuousness was embraced wholeheartedly, like in the days of seductress Marilyn Monroe. In those days, the perfect woman’s measurements were 36-26-36, like a curvy hourglass.

Nowadays, the ideal shape of a woman is 34-24-34, down by two inches, and with breast enhancements to boot, women can get as skinny as they want and retain their ample bosoms (or rather, the surgeon’s ample bosoms).

But there is some kind of breakdown somewhere. After all, the average size for women in America is 12, and most of the women in Hollywood range somewhere between sizes 2 and 5. So where does that leave the average woman? Well, it’s safe to say anywhere but Hollywood.

Heroin Chic
Long gone are the days when malnourished models with raccoon eyes were seen as glamorous and desirable. Nowadays curvy babes are back and it’s likely because men and women alike were getting sick and tired of seeing women with bodies like twelve-year-old boys plastered in every advertisement.

In walk Gisele and Laetitia and before you know it, shape is where ship is at again. God knows, I, for one, am glad to see that some women don’t feel the need to see their bones protruding before they’re satisfied with the way they look.

Guys Want Health
Obviously, no one likes a glutton; after all, it is one of the seven deadly sins. But a healthy girl who exercises and takes care of herself is quite desirable for all men. Being a size 6 isn’t really that important to most guys, it’s only when women start out as a size 6 and end up as a size 14 that we become somewhat antsy.

Men do look at models and actresses with lustful thoughts, but in reality, lust and long-term relationships don’t usually go hand in hand. So while the media shows off the virtually flawless 2% of the population, here we are watching the meatier women go by. Enjoy the view.

Culled from www.nottiehottie.over-blog.com

Very cool blogger, your view is well laid down here and I am guessing not everybody would still want a lady weighing over 200 pounds. likes vary.

Joseph Osodi signing out

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COMMITMENT

Story one:

Deborah K. Johnson writes: ‘My seven-year-old daughter wanted to take violin lessons, so I took her to a music store to rent an instrument. Hoping she would understand the importance of making a commitment to practice, I explained that lessons were expensive. I was willing to make the financial sacrifice if she promised to work hard. “There may be times you’ll feel like giving up,” I said, “but I want you to hang in there!” She nodded, understanding, then in her most serious voice she said, “It will be just like marriage, right, Mom?’

Story two

A husband asked his wife, ‘Tell me, dear, have you ever been in love before?’ She thought for a moment and replied, ‘No, darling. I once respected a man for his great intelligence. I admired another one for his remarkable courage. And I was captivated by yet another for his good looks and charm. But with you, well, how else could I explain it, except love?

 Have you been finding fault with your mate instead of remembering the qualities that attracted you to them? Attitudes are like weeds, they spring up overnight and if you don’t deal with them they take over the whole garden. Don’t let that happen! Next time you’re too busy to show love, or you react in anger, read these words: ‘Love is patient and kind. Love…does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged…Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.

Life most times is frustrating when things don’t go well as planned, most people give up on themselves and on others, most people forget the very core of their existence, but with commitment you can stand in the face of uncertainity and know that whatever decision you make is for the better goal. Your decision determines your destiny, decide to hang in today, you would succeed.

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LIFE DEFINITIONS

Good morning all, sorry I have been off for a while, just resumed after my break and work demands. I am currently in Asaba, Delta state where I am co faciliating a training for my colleagues in the state. Exceptional Salesmanship is aimed at preparing them for the challenges that would come with the job. The new things to learn, best practice in sales, self mastery and winning ways.

I present to you some definitions in life that guide you through making the best out of life, most people make decisions that turn around to marr them, the water that passes your feet where you stand today you would never see again, so never take it likely things you hear and read.

There are certain principles that guide those who we mentor, those who we see as our guide to life, I am pleased to present a post from a friend Ayo Daniels; LIFE DEFINITIONS

1. Truth: Genuineness, reality. The state of being true to yourself, trueness in all sense of all without self conceit and deceit and by extension how you love to treat others from the depth of your convictions.

2. Equity: Even handedness, fair play. Being just and fair at every instance and speaking for the cause of others who seem to be less advantaged and can’t help themselves.

 3. Capacity Building: Competency, building inner strength to handle adversities. Ability to hold and contain. Most failures are attributed to loosing the power within. “If you fail in the days of adversity, it means your inner strength is not developed with fortitude”

 4. Talented: Artistic, gifted and endowed. To be skilful showing great ability and being in charge of your sphere of life.

5. Forthrightness: Frankness, candour. To be honest and straightforward at the risk of missing out on the seemly opportunities.

6. Balanced: Reasonable, impartial, objective and unbiased. To make or keep steady.

7. Winning: Endearing, engaging and disarming. To be victorious, win and turn out successful after achieving the desired set goals.

 Whatever is true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy, (meditate, stop, think and take action) on these values again this week. Leaders are expected to live on the cutting edge; it is not a matter of convenience but rather of commitment. Commit to these “sharp practices” and you will achieve an enviable balance in your life. It’s not too late to start from where you are today, make a U turn, face life head on, make the best out of what you want and watch how good things unfold to you.

 See you on top.

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WHAT DO WOMEN FIND ATTRACTIVE?

I was out with my wife yesterday and as we chatted, the question came up: “What do women find attractive in men?” I was curious about her take, so she said without hesitation: “Humor and confidence.” Then, she hesitated. I’m sure she wanted to name a third quality, but couldn’t make up her mind: brains? Posture? Charisma? Wit? Audacity? So we stopped and asked two girls sitting by the wayside. “Smile”, one said, and the other added: “A man’s eyes.” And I say: all of it is spot-on, and the good news is, a man can develop every attractive feature women desire. Even the eyes and the smile.

Appearance and personality

It’s funny: my intuitive answers to my friend’s questions – classic “pickup” knowledge turned into reflexes – described qualities of character, while the girls quickly responded with physical appearances – a smile, the eyes. “Visible” things. I think we’re both right. And we’re both saying the same thing.

I know a bunch of guys who know how to smile and have eyes like Terence Hill or Johnny Depp. Yet, they suck when it comes to women – and not in a good way. If I’d introduced them to the two ladies, they would have made sure to run away before boredom would render them immobile and endlessly expose them to these guys’ monotonous droning and drooling.

Yet, a man that has his personality, confidence and demeanor together will almost automatically have the smile and eyes to go with them. To become attractive, you want to work on both: personality and appearance.

Let’s look at the the skills before we explore how to get in.

Personality

To trigger attraction in a woman, you want to be:

– Challenging
– Smart
– Funny
– Confident

Traits like these build your charismatic personality. You can be challenging by playfully teasing a girl: “Oh, you just want me for my body“, “I’ll have to break up with you and keep our car and pet platypus“, “and you think that’s how you earn points with me?” Re-frame your interaction as a sexual treat that she’s trying to earn, but is in the process of losing. Continue reading

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JOSEPHEKWU WEDS

Its 7.30 Ghana time and I just stepped down from an Arik Air flight from Nigeria, its my first time here in the city of the black stars, its barely 5 days since I tied the knot with my college sweetheart. yes you read that. I wrote a post titled MY SECRET sometime in February 2009 about the most important lady in my life, a lady I met in college and started a friendship which culminated in matrimony on Saturday.

Today I begin my honeymoon and among other things on my mind, I would like to appreciate God for this wonderful creation of His that has stood by me through these years, through thick and thin to see that majority of my dreams comes to reality. I have seen a lot of things in my short time, and she has been a pillar of support to me. It all started like a dream and friends and family members always asked what I liked about her, well I really cant say for sure, pointing out one things would be difficult cos she is full of everything,very understanding and ready to listen at any point in time.

February 26 2011, Joseph Osodi finally said I DO to the most beautiful lady in the world, well my world, this date marks the beginning of new things in my life, a day when my dearest dream came to past, a few of my blog mates once commented on the post I wrote to her, wishing that this day would come, well here it has and also has opened doors to different new things, its a good thing that i have found and I totally treasure her.

Most people are scared to commit, giving different excuses for staying single, I felt in my heart that this ways the right thing to do at this time, cos my destiny is built on proper decisions, it was an easy call for me cos the relationship has been for 9 years, so the conviction was there that no one but me would head the home where this beauty would dwell.

No matter what you do, remember that friendship is key,it  is the only binding force that would help a man and woman stay together forever. most people dive into marriage for different purposes and in so sooner a time they jump out, with broken homes and hearts, the best advice is to build a friendship with your spouse, its never too late to get into serious talking terms that would help propel the relationship to the next level

I would be hanging up now as I have to enjoy this honey on my moon, but I promise to return with a post on details of the honey moon.

I would like to advice other singles out there that relationships last only when both parties trust each other totally, this we both enjoyed and gave us lasting friendship, let go of material things that is so not needed, most people crave for irrelevant things and this gives them a high maintenance image, guys should not be too scared to approach you, never be too intimidated to hola at you when you roll by, humility is the ingredient for success. look way beyond now, always begin with the end in mind, know who you are and what you are, learn self mastery. Also I must say its not easy, we didnt get here with ease, the turbulence was really high and coupled with interferance from different angles, but with a clear focus and direction the future is just a picture perfect frame sitting on the wall.

I have duties……………..

Joseph Osodi Signing out

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JUDGE NOT

Whenever we try to change others around, we tend to run into bigger problems than we can imagine from the onset. We generally seek to change people through acts of manipulations, criticisms, orders, threats, or rewards when they take on strange behaviours. This week conduct this test in a safe environment by intentionally telling someone: what they are doing is wrong and there is no hope for them to change in anyway. They will suddenly become quiet, resent you, gossip about you, or purposefully do what you said not to do. So we always seek to try to change people, but rarely succeed. We expect people to suddenly change while we remain unchanged. People develop rigid perspectives on money, family, work, emotions, and their relationships and create severe friction that can destroy a relationship. Can you identify with these thoughts: “If my co-worker stopped…then I’d be able to…?” “If my son stopped…then I could…” “My partner should…then I’d feel…” I’ll give you an if-statement to remember: if you don’t change, you have no right to expect people to change.

We love to judge others and our judgments can be criticism, labelling, diagnosing, and praising. We criticize (You are no good at helping me), label (“You are stupid), diagnose (Stop being rude because you didn’t get what you wanted), and praise (You are the sweetest person for doing that even when it’s obvious that the person didn’t measured up). Each judgment has its own problems but we must learn not to judge others so that we won’t be judged. Remember with the same cynicism we take in judging others, we will be judged because of the law of sowing and reaping. We should all learn to treat people with hope, love and faith to see the desired change over time. Love is patient, kind, not puffed up, does not behave rudely, thinks no evil and believes the best of everyone.

Ayo Daniels

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