I was out with my wife yesterday and as we chatted, the question came up: “What do women find attractive in men?” I was curious about her take, so she said without hesitation: “Humor and confidence.” Then, she hesitated. I’m sure she wanted to name a third quality, but couldn’t make up her mind: brains? Posture? Charisma? Wit? Audacity? So we stopped and asked two girls sitting by the wayside. “Smile”, one said, and the other added: “A man’s eyes.” And I say: all of it is spot-on, and the good news is, a man can develop every attractive feature women desire. Even the eyes and the smile.
Appearance and personality
It’s funny: my intuitive answers to my friend’s questions – classic “pickup” knowledge turned into reflexes – described qualities of character, while the girls quickly responded with physical appearances – a smile, the eyes. “Visible” things. I think we’re both right. And we’re both saying the same thing.
I know a bunch of guys who know how to smile and have eyes like Terence Hill or Johnny Depp. Yet, they suck when it comes to women – and not in a good way. If I’d introduced them to the two ladies, they would have made sure to run away before boredom would render them immobile and endlessly expose them to these guys’ monotonous droning and drooling.
Yet, a man that has his personality, confidence and demeanor together will almost automatically have the smile and eyes to go with them. To become attractive, you want to work on both: personality and appearance.
Let’s look at the the skills before we explore how to get in.
To trigger attraction in a woman, you want to be:
Traits like these build your charismatic personality. You can be challenging by playfully teasing a girl: “Oh, you just want me for my body“, “I’ll have to break up with you and keep our car and pet platypus“, “and you think that’s how you earn points with me?” Re-frame your interaction as a sexual treat that she’s trying to earn, but is in the process of losing.
Hey, when you start talking to her, she probably won’t be interested in “getting” you. But watch her start to chase you when you accuse her of it, and telling her she’ll lose you. Be playful about it, smile, but don’t be a clown – leave her wondering whether you’re serious or not. Be just a bit too convinced of your awesomeness. The great thing is, this alone makes you appear funny, smart and confident at the same time.
Never give her a clear answer unless it’s “no”. This is flirting – it’s not about being honest, it’s about being intriguing. You’re not in a job interview. Inject some life into it! When she asks you what you do, which answer is better?
– “I sell insurance plans.”
– “I came here to hunt down my nemesis, the Joker, but then I took up stripping.”
Now, another little hint for you. You can do the above to “trigger” attraction – but what qualities will allow you to “keep” it?
A good seducer knows when to switch gears, too. But this is material for another article. Now, I’m going to hand you the ticket that qualifies you.
An Attractive Appearance
Your physical appearance is the very first impression you project. It could be your the last. You see, even the most intriguing character can be screwed up by bad posture, unkempt looks, smell or a bad outfit. Get a stylish pair of shoes, a fashionable haircut, fitting clothes that show your body in the best light possible. Work out and do sports to stay in shape, eat healthily, make sure you have enough sleep and periods of relaxation in your day.
In short, take care for yourself.
Ultimately, it’s not just about “What do women find attractive?” You’ll find that what they’re attracted to is good for you to begin with: social skills, health, humor, fashionable looks, success, wealth, strength, confidence. If you improve these aspects of your life, of yourself, you won’t just become more attractive to women. You will become a better person all around.