EMOTIONAL CHEATING

Cheating

People define cheating differently. Some people define it as an emotional act as well as a physical act and others just define it as a physical act.
That topic alone can cause some issues in a relationship if both parties define cheating differently.
So, in order to eliminate obstacles that may later come into play it’s always best to make certain you know how the other person in the relationship defines something like that.
Although it’s not pertinent that couples are exactly alike, there are obviously some important areas in a relationship which help uplift it rather than hinder it. And this type of topic can be one of those things.
Truthfully, I believe that it’s difficult to keep the romance alive and a relationship on a positive note if you’re unable to work in unity with your spouse. Especially if one of you defines cheating in one way and the other defines cheating in another way.
Usually, physical cheating is what we all refer to as cheating. It’s a general consensus, so it’s emotional cheating that can be the real culprit behind ruining a great relationship.

What exactly is Emotional Cheating?
Well there are different levels of emotional cheating, but let’s discuss the most significant forms of emotional cheating…

1) Lying by Omission
Some women consider cheating to be a secret that is kept from them. For instance, their spouse has a dinner date with another woman, but doesn’t bother to mention it.
Whether this situation is considered cheating depends on the relationship you have with your partner and the type of friendships you have outside of your partnership.
Since the pendulum can swing either way it’s best to make certain you both see eye-to-eye before it ever happens (if it ever does). Maybe you don’t think it’s important to mention it because it doesn’t mean anything and mentioning it would give it more weight than it’s worth, but it’s best not to assume something like that but to talk it over instead.

The reason for that is because, on the contrary, some women feel that if it was so unimportant, then why not just mention it. It’s a catch-22 situation. So, constructive ways to handle a circumstance like that it to discuss it with one another before it ever has a chance to occur.

2) The “Roaming Eye”
When I speak of the “roaming eye” I mean visual disrespect to your partner. Acknowledging someone’s beauty is one thing, but the “roaming eye” is a much more intense act.
It’s beyond acknowledgement. In a situation like that, fantasy creeps in and your partner feels mistreated or upset due to the act of disregarding her and making it clear you would like to have sex with the person in your sights.
Under those conditions, it can turn into a huge problem for the relationship. Of course, it’s one thing to notice someone’s beauty from time to time, but the “roaming eye” is another thing altogether. It can lead to insecurity issues, trust issues, and sometimes result in actual physical cheating.

So exactly what is the “roaming eye?”
Although I couldn’t possibly mention everything, let’s talk about the more obvious actions…
The “roaming eye” constitutes going to strip clubs, ogling women in the street, and commenting can also be a part of the issue in which verbal insinuations are made concerning what you would like to do with that person. Taken too far, it can be emotionally abusive to your partner and result in a destructive relationship that could eventually lead you both in separate directions.
So, a constructive way to handle this situation on a personal basis, is to treat any woman like you would want someone to treat your wife, sister, mother, or any other female that you regard with the highest respect.
Of course, it isn’t always going to work because you’re human, but it’s a good place to start.
By asking yourself, “How do I want other men to treat my partner?” can help you change the entire way you see things.
For example, someone ogling your wife in a disrespectful way is most likely something you would not take kindly to. Perhaps you’d even be infuriated if you witnessed it happening. So, if you apply those feelings to a woman that catches your eye, it makes it somewhat easier to want to treat that person with a lot more respect.
After all she is someone else’s relative. Obviously not yours, but someone’s

Consider saying something like…
“I wanted to talk to you about something, but before I bring it up, I thought maybe we could talk about how we want to handle this conversation, because I don’t want anything getting in the way of us resolving it. I know sometimes I can be stubborn, so I feel it’s important for me to say that when we discuss this I don’t plan on allowing that to interfere with us fixing this situation.”
When confronting it like that, it allows the problem to take the forefront so that when you do end up discussing it, it makes it easier for you both to stay focused on the topic at hand and keep it on a positive note.
You can then discuss it in layers by trying to explain why you do what you do (besides the obvious reasons) and she can explain how it makes her feel and then you can both focus on how to resolve the issue together–in unity.
It’s easy to feel that emotional cheating doesn’t hurt anyone, because in certain ways it can be defined as an invisible act, but don’t underestimate the damage that it can have on a relationship. It can do just as much damage as its lethal counterpart “physical cheating.”
Sure, there may not be any touching involved, but infidelity is not just a physical act. Remember, be objective, be honest, and most of all… be fair. You are no exception to the rule.
Work hard at being faithful to your partner in more ways than one–mind and body.

2 Comments

Filed under Love and relationship

2 responses to “EMOTIONAL CHEATING

  1. omosolatola

    yes o, brother, cheating na bad thing o, and yes cheating isn’t only when you get physical with someone else apart from your spouse, you are also cheating when you give someone else as much attention or more than you give your spouse.

  2. Wow… that was a nice one. You sure did hit the nail on the head. Thumbs up bro!!!

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